Take Me chapter 11
Jun. 11th, 2007 08:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
tamchroninThis is the second to last chapter of "Take Me". I'm working on the last chapter and hope to have it up soon. It's time for me to finish all these fanfics and actually *work* on writing again. Feedback is more appreciated than ever. Don't make me beg. It's not a pretty sight.
If you missed the chapters that came before, or just need a refresher, all the previous chapters can be found in my memories.
RTW or Generations should be finished next, when I'm stuck on my original stuff. Just got to get the gears turning again. ~hugs~ Thanks for reading, in advance!
Take Me
Beautiful Goodbye
Clow
I'm not sure how we managed to keep him with us even as long as we did. In that time, I worked on cards and learned more about the nature of the universe and how to bend it to my will. My most important project was one I kept from both Yue and Touya easily enough. We were all in a warm glow of fresh love, and I took advantage of the selfish aspects of that emotion in my own way.
Five months we woke together, and slept together, and I don't think I'd gotten that much sleep since I learned to master that urge within myself. For anyone else, those might have been quite unproductive months, but I think despite the loss of time to sleep I was more productive than ever in my desire to never let what we had go.
Within a week of Touya's arrival I could feel the magic that had brought him to us begin to unravel, and I was determined to prolong it. For Yue's sake. For my own sake.
My latest, and to date most powerful card rested on my knee. I stared at it hard, wishing it held the key even still, though I knew it did not.
I finally shook my head and slid the card into the book, feeling that the name I'd chosen as my hope was now mocking me. The Return. It was inevitable.
Touya had to return to his own time.
I smiled softly, trying to hide the pain even from myself. There had been signs that it was time for change once again. My mother's beautiful garden had finally begun to show hints of truth beneath the carefully crafted illusion. I'd received a message from a colleague in Japan that my presence would be appreciated. And, by that, she meant required, as close as she could ever come to demanding my presence. The cards were restless, though still firmly within my control.
A million small things all pointed to the same conclusion.
I stood and walked out of the library, wondering where Touya and Yue were at this time of day. I wandered, following my feet without thinking too hard about what I was doing, and of course I found myself where I needed to be. They were sitting together in the kitchen with the remains of their meal pushed aside while they continued to talk.
Yue stopped as soon as I walked in, turning to me with a bright smile. "Clow! I thought you would be busy for a few more hours."
He started to rise, clearly intending to make lunch for me as well, but I raised my hand and shook my head. "That won't be necessary."
Touya's expression was immediately neutral, and I didn't have to be psychic to know that he knew where my thoughts were this afternoon. For someone who thought himself my inferior, he had insight to match my own at times like this.
I sat down, still with the same smile. My mother had smiled like this, until the end. It was a disconcerting comparison to make, even within my own mind, but it did not make the mask slip in the least. It was an almost comforting reminder of a comfortable past that was now forever gone, as this time would soon be.
"It's time," Touya said, when the silence had gone on a bit too long.
"Almost," I agreed in a softer voice than I'd intended. "The time has come to move from this home, at least."
"To Japan?" Yue asked, leaning forward eagerly.
"Yes, that will be our ultimate destination. I want to spend a while in China first, though." I thought of my colleague in Japan and shrugged. "Or, perhaps, some time in each place."
Yue smiled, looking at Touya. "You can show me where your house will be, and we can show you things that have been lost to history, right?"
The silence went on just long enough, as each of us waited for the other to break the bad news. Yue's face lost its expression and he finally nodded as Touya found his voice.
"I don't think that will be possible."
The silence grew, and then Yue finally stood, cleaning up after their lunch and then leaving the room.
"He'll deal with it in his own way," I said quietly at last.
"I hope so," Touya replied, unconvinced. His eyebrows were knit tightly together, with a small crease between them that had been growing deeper for the past month.
I smiled more, trying to will him to follow suit. "You'll be going home at last."
"I've missed Sakura," he allowed, and it seemed like his smile escaped despite himself. "Do you know how long--?"
"Tomorrow."
That's all we said. It was all that needed to be said between us. He stood, touching my shoulder to offer comfort even though I'd tried so hard to hide that I needed it. He went to find Yue, to make everything as right as he could in what time he had.
None of us slept that night. I think Yue and I both were memorizing everything about our lover before we had to say goodbye. For Yue it would be a very long time before they would find each other again.
For me, this was a more permanent goodbye.
And suddenly, in the middle of the day when we paused for a meal, he was suddenly gone.
Yue mourned as if Touya had died. This was my creation's first real goodbye, and he didn't handle it well. Life turned upside down, and I pushed our move forward faster in hopes that the change of location would help ease the pain.
I realized too late that I'd made a huge mistake with that decision. Instead of removing painful reminders, I'd only ripped away all the security Yue had known. At times he was distant, at times he was irritable and snappish, but worst of all was that not a night passed where he slipped into tears when he thought I was sleeping.
Two years of this, and I made another mistake in my desperation. I told myself I made the card as a safety measure, in case anything went wrong with the other cards, but the real reason I created The Void was to erase Yue's never ending sorrow.
I removed Touya from his memory, from his heart, to give him what peace I could. To turn him into the sweet and adoring angel I had fallen in love with again.
To erase the reminder I saw in his eyes of my own loss.
It almost worked. It took more time, and I created Cerberus as another distraction, along with some of my more frivolous cards. The reward came when Yue smiled again, but he never regained the sweet innocence he'd had before Touya left us.
My colleague, Yuuko, chided me for my decisions. Well, perhaps "chided" is too mild a word. Berated constantly and loudly, except when drunk, is more like it. And once I found that exception, I shamelessly exploited it.
Life grew more stable, until Yue could convince himself that it's how life had always been.
And finally, I knew how Touya must have felt when I woke up one day and realized it was my time, as well. And I left this world with a smile, knowing that upon my passing my angel would find love again.
If you missed the chapters that came before, or just need a refresher, all the previous chapters can be found in my memories.
RTW or Generations should be finished next, when I'm stuck on my original stuff. Just got to get the gears turning again. ~hugs~ Thanks for reading, in advance!
Beautiful Goodbye
Clow
I'm not sure how we managed to keep him with us even as long as we did. In that time, I worked on cards and learned more about the nature of the universe and how to bend it to my will. My most important project was one I kept from both Yue and Touya easily enough. We were all in a warm glow of fresh love, and I took advantage of the selfish aspects of that emotion in my own way.
Five months we woke together, and slept together, and I don't think I'd gotten that much sleep since I learned to master that urge within myself. For anyone else, those might have been quite unproductive months, but I think despite the loss of time to sleep I was more productive than ever in my desire to never let what we had go.
Within a week of Touya's arrival I could feel the magic that had brought him to us begin to unravel, and I was determined to prolong it. For Yue's sake. For my own sake.
My latest, and to date most powerful card rested on my knee. I stared at it hard, wishing it held the key even still, though I knew it did not.
I finally shook my head and slid the card into the book, feeling that the name I'd chosen as my hope was now mocking me. The Return. It was inevitable.
Touya had to return to his own time.
I smiled softly, trying to hide the pain even from myself. There had been signs that it was time for change once again. My mother's beautiful garden had finally begun to show hints of truth beneath the carefully crafted illusion. I'd received a message from a colleague in Japan that my presence would be appreciated. And, by that, she meant required, as close as she could ever come to demanding my presence. The cards were restless, though still firmly within my control.
A million small things all pointed to the same conclusion.
I stood and walked out of the library, wondering where Touya and Yue were at this time of day. I wandered, following my feet without thinking too hard about what I was doing, and of course I found myself where I needed to be. They were sitting together in the kitchen with the remains of their meal pushed aside while they continued to talk.
Yue stopped as soon as I walked in, turning to me with a bright smile. "Clow! I thought you would be busy for a few more hours."
He started to rise, clearly intending to make lunch for me as well, but I raised my hand and shook my head. "That won't be necessary."
Touya's expression was immediately neutral, and I didn't have to be psychic to know that he knew where my thoughts were this afternoon. For someone who thought himself my inferior, he had insight to match my own at times like this.
I sat down, still with the same smile. My mother had smiled like this, until the end. It was a disconcerting comparison to make, even within my own mind, but it did not make the mask slip in the least. It was an almost comforting reminder of a comfortable past that was now forever gone, as this time would soon be.
"It's time," Touya said, when the silence had gone on a bit too long.
"Almost," I agreed in a softer voice than I'd intended. "The time has come to move from this home, at least."
"To Japan?" Yue asked, leaning forward eagerly.
"Yes, that will be our ultimate destination. I want to spend a while in China first, though." I thought of my colleague in Japan and shrugged. "Or, perhaps, some time in each place."
Yue smiled, looking at Touya. "You can show me where your house will be, and we can show you things that have been lost to history, right?"
The silence went on just long enough, as each of us waited for the other to break the bad news. Yue's face lost its expression and he finally nodded as Touya found his voice.
"I don't think that will be possible."
The silence grew, and then Yue finally stood, cleaning up after their lunch and then leaving the room.
"He'll deal with it in his own way," I said quietly at last.
"I hope so," Touya replied, unconvinced. His eyebrows were knit tightly together, with a small crease between them that had been growing deeper for the past month.
I smiled more, trying to will him to follow suit. "You'll be going home at last."
"I've missed Sakura," he allowed, and it seemed like his smile escaped despite himself. "Do you know how long--?"
"Tomorrow."
That's all we said. It was all that needed to be said between us. He stood, touching my shoulder to offer comfort even though I'd tried so hard to hide that I needed it. He went to find Yue, to make everything as right as he could in what time he had.
None of us slept that night. I think Yue and I both were memorizing everything about our lover before we had to say goodbye. For Yue it would be a very long time before they would find each other again.
For me, this was a more permanent goodbye.
And suddenly, in the middle of the day when we paused for a meal, he was suddenly gone.
Yue mourned as if Touya had died. This was my creation's first real goodbye, and he didn't handle it well. Life turned upside down, and I pushed our move forward faster in hopes that the change of location would help ease the pain.
I realized too late that I'd made a huge mistake with that decision. Instead of removing painful reminders, I'd only ripped away all the security Yue had known. At times he was distant, at times he was irritable and snappish, but worst of all was that not a night passed where he slipped into tears when he thought I was sleeping.
Two years of this, and I made another mistake in my desperation. I told myself I made the card as a safety measure, in case anything went wrong with the other cards, but the real reason I created The Void was to erase Yue's never ending sorrow.
I removed Touya from his memory, from his heart, to give him what peace I could. To turn him into the sweet and adoring angel I had fallen in love with again.
To erase the reminder I saw in his eyes of my own loss.
It almost worked. It took more time, and I created Cerberus as another distraction, along with some of my more frivolous cards. The reward came when Yue smiled again, but he never regained the sweet innocence he'd had before Touya left us.
My colleague, Yuuko, chided me for my decisions. Well, perhaps "chided" is too mild a word. Berated constantly and loudly, except when drunk, is more like it. And once I found that exception, I shamelessly exploited it.
Life grew more stable, until Yue could convince himself that it's how life had always been.
And finally, I knew how Touya must have felt when I woke up one day and realized it was my time, as well. And I left this world with a smile, knowing that upon my passing my angel would find love again.
